luvin4kidz

I really need to get some kind of organization together for my kids. Right now I feel like we run in complete chaos! My oldest is doing very poorly in school (as I have mentioned before), my preschooler is having trouble because he is just not used to sitting still and listening to someone all day? I've tried a number of times to get chores assigned, but it is hard to enforce these things when DH acts like I'm wasting my time and doesn't want to help out in any way! I've decided that I need to get a routine going with chores and quiet-time for studying...and I'm going to have to tell DH that he WILL help to enforce our new routine (or else). Does anyone have any ideas for me as to how to get the ball rolling and stick with it? How can I get my kids interested?

mcbean

I know some people have great success with daily charts. We don't use them, but I can see how they work. If there was some kind of reward system associated with it maybe? Hmmm, I'll have to think on this one.

KATin NJ

Skye,
MY kids are too young to chime in with great advice, however my parents has a great system....As soon as we returned from school, we had to do homework and one chore of our choice from a list. It was first come, first serve...So, if I got home and did my homework FIRST, I may only have to take the trash out. Then, we could do what we wanted until dinner. By dinner time mom (or dad) checked homework and we each went over it with them. THEN we were allowed TV, etc.....

When sports came into play in MS and HS, we got home later. The chores were moved to Sat ams...NO ONE had free time until "family chores" were done. This meant 2 hours of "family stuff" before recreation. Seems a bit strict, but looking back it was smart. we learned they we all are repsonsible for the family "working".

JenR

I went to a seminar by a ped's office here that supports "Conscious Discipline" ideas - I think the woman's name was Becky Bailey. They had some great ideas, and they were all about routines and rituals. I've been reading "Positive Disclipline" and my ped's book, "Who's the boss" recently, and both kind of have the same idea - establish routines that are always followed and written down. It would take some time to begin, but I think totally worth it. They do not support reward charts since that makes it seem like these things are "special", not things you do every day, but maybe for extraordinary things (extra chores, being very cooperative, getting out of the house by 8 instead of 8:15, something like that?). The seminar was called "How to leave the house without losing your mind"

Edited to add that Kat's parents had some good ideas!

brandanaleighana

We have a list of morning and evening routines. Last year, we started doing one thing on the list until it became habit and then would add the next thing, etc. It worked quite well until Frances was born. Then my life got chaotic again. But we're trying to pick our habits up again. The house seemed to run so smoothly when we followed those basic routines.

Sparqi

Kat, that is a great system your parents had.

Vanesa

Skye I don't have any advice. Just want to say that you had a great idea I'm sure it woul d help because kids *need* (not sure is the right word here, maybe should say I THINK it's good for kids) things that are predictable. But also know that changes are not easy, so probably it's going to take sometime to get in to the new routine.
I hope your DH would understand how important this is for teh family and he would help you.